Batter Up

You never know what the universe is going to throw at you until it does, and when it does, you’ve probably left your catcher’s mitt in the other room.

People keep asking me why we finally decided to stop smoking when we did and the only answer I can give is that the time was right. Something in the stars aligned, the divine consciousness came out of its comatose slumber, kismet stuck a foot into the aisle and I stumbled over it. As this year draws on, I become more and more aware that the universe is trying it tell me something. I’m trying to listen.

After boxing class the other day, I had some time to kill, so did some yoga and stretching. Sensei was softly shuffling papers in his little cubicle and dopey love songs were playing in the background. I spent the last fifteen minutes meditating and when I opened my eyes, just for the briefest of moments, I didn’t know who or where I was. I think that means I’m doing it right.

PENTAX DIGITAL CAMERASo when lovely Kelly invited me to a yoga nidra class at the studio she goes to, I thought the universe was once again whispering in my ear and I went. The yoga part was challenging but fulfilling. The movements of the woman next to me were poetry, especially compared to my awkward fumbling, but instead of feeling embarrassed, I felt inspired. She flowed more smoothly than a river and each pose was a transient moment of pure beauty.

The nidra part is a guided meditation that is supposed to be a form of conscious sleeping, but I guess I didn’t do it right because all I could think was, “I wish the silly woman would shut up so I can focus on not focusing on anything.” She did say, though, that we could send out a little healing to someone who might need it. I did. You know who you are.

While this has so far been an astonishing year, I am finding I need to look deep inside myself to find the strength to cope with the obstacle course that is laying itself out in front of me. Each day offers new joys and challenges. I remind myself to be grateful for all the good things in my life, grateful for the roof over my head and the food in my fridge, grateful for the good people who touch my life every day, grateful for my body as it carries me through my days, grateful for every breath I take. I can’t possibly be prepared for the unknowable, but I can keep my catcher’s mitt handy and at least try to catch a good game.

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